My mind, however- refuses to sit still and enjoy the calm and quiet that today brought. It keeps racing over every detail, of every situation. From worries about my upcoming wedding, to Barb's upcoming heart surgery and the family from down state that will be coming up. To my Dad's temporary bout with blindness and my own Mom's issues with her home and the child protective services.

My Dad has only one eye taht he can see out of. His right eye is useless, poked by his brother when they were kids enjoying a game of basketball and sibling rivalry I'm sure. They gave new meaning to the words my parents uttered oh so often over the years about being careful, we might poke someone's eye out. My Uncle Jim got my Dad's! Well, from time to time and fortunately, not often- he'll geta cold or something in his good eye. He got one again that infected and became blind. The antibiotics they gave him haven't worked. So today, he had to go to the doctor and get a shot right in his eyeball. Fun! Fun! But he says that was working already. So that eased my mind.

My mom hasbeen dealing with C.P.S. I'm told. They came in and told her she has to get a new porch, buy all new windows and do some other home improvements in a certain time frame or they'll condemn her shit hole of a house. Egads! I wish she'd just take her damn income tax and get an apartment in a better area of town instead of the "crack hood" she lives in now.

And then I just got an e-mail from my cousin Chrissy. My Aunt Brenda's brain tumor is growing back again. They will not operate a third time, but will try some radiation. That's not sounding too promising.

All that, and a wedding coming up for me in September. My mind's literally awash in a mass of thoughts and emotions and it just won't quit. I'm trying to not let it all eat at me though. And tonight, if onyl for a few hours- I succeeded!

Jamie was a bit grumpy at work. But he only worked a half shift so towards the end of his night, he was in a better mood. Frank and Bryan were both in rare form tonight and had us all cracking up like you wouldn't believe.

It's kind of funny to me- knowing that no matter how bad things get at home with all the stresses I am dealing with- going to work can actually be a blessing! With friends there like Frank, Jamie and Bryan- you almost can't help but pack away the excess baggages and smile and laugh along with them.

I've got a long weekend ahead of me. I have been slacking in the house work that needs to be done desperately. So I plan to tackle that tomorrow. Now that I have running water, I might even manage to get the carpets scrubbed.

Tammy, Shawn's cousin's wife is holding a toy party tomorrow. Kind of like a Tupperware Party, but with sex toys. She's always hostessing some kind of party or another- but I am usually working. But this type of party is right up my alley and I won't be at work. So I mgiht just make this one. What's a sex toy party without the likes of me anyways? A boring one- I'll tell you that much!

And then Sunday, the family members from down state will all start making their way North to be here for his Mom's surgery. So we'll be headed to the hospital and entertaining I'm sure.

But no matter what- it's chin up, people. (Not chins anymore. Woot!) No more tears for what might happen. All positive thoughts and hopes and prayers. Besides, after the past week or two- I'm all cried out!

Thank God for that. Luckily, I've got a few laughs and a whole lotta smiles saved up.

Nothing wrong with being all cried out, now is there?

Thanks for tuning in! I'm going to work on drafting up some guest lists and what not.

Simply,

Sara