And that's exactly how today has been. I awoke several times throughout the night to pee as it is now par for the course being pregnant and all. But I awoke for what I thought was the day at 8:30 a.m. I got up, trekked groggily to the bathroom. Indulged in a cup of java and cuddled up alone on the couch and watched Phantom of the Opera. A friend's Mom got me hooked on the CD from the Opera when I was still in high school. It seems like ages ago now. I never have been a huge fan of Opera, but for some reason- this one grabbed me like none other. I have always dreampt of going to see it live. And in fact, Shawn and I were just planning a vacation later in the year to NYC and a trip to broadway to see the Phantom of teh Opera on Broadway. Doesn't look like we'll have the opportunity now with everything going on. So I settled for the next best thing... Pay_Per-View! The movie was even better than I had anticipated. It made so much more sense to me to see the entire story than just piecing together the songs on the CD.

After the movie, I drifted off into a nap. When I awoke, I made a sandwhich and settled back onto the couch to watch a couple of my beloved cooking shows. Then I started washing and hanging laundry out to dry. Never fun, but a task that needed to be done.

I picked up a bit before waking Shawn. And we induged in an afternoon session of love making before starting our task of being lazy today.

Since then, we have made and ate dinner. We settled in to watch another ppv movie, Ocean's Twelve. It ended up he watched it, I napped... again. I seem to spend most of my days when not working eating, peeing and napping. I am really starting to miss having energy. Because mine surely has depleted.

My body is definately changing. I am finally starting to actually feel pregnant. My breasts are sore and extremely tender. My belly now almost feels a bit foreign to me if you will. And my hips hurt. It looks like I am getting the starts of vericose veins in my legs damn it. And nothing tastes good anymore. I crave so many things, but when I try them, everything makes me queasy.

Shawn and I have decided that we don;t wish to know the sex of the baby when we finally do get an ultra sound. We both want it to be a suprise. Most people think we're nuts. I guess we're just old fashioned. But we have picked baby names out. It's funny really because I have forever tossed names at him and we can never agree on any. So I knew this task would not be easy. And yet, it was! Shocked the hell out of me.

My sisters named my baby if it's a girl. They kept talking about the name Chloe all last weekend and we both like it. So if we have a girl, as of right now, her name will be Chloe Helene. Helene was his grandma's name. And if it's a boy Noah John. I have always loved the name Noah. Shawn's not a hueg fan, but he says it beat the alternatives. John after my father. And his grandfather. People say it might change when the baby comes, and to be honest- I still run through names a lot. But so far- those two are it.

Now if we end up with twins as Shawn hopes... let's pray we get a peter and a bleeder or it's the name game all over again. Ugh. I dread the thought.

Well, I have officially lost 140 lbs. since my gastric bypass. I started at 367 lbs and am down to 225 lbs. The doc says it's highly possible that I might still continue to lose weight.I have no idea how this will go. Their goal weight for me is to lose 45 more pounds to put me at 180. I have cut out as much junk as possible and loading up on vitamins, water, healthy foods as often as possible and lots of walking.

I have so much on my plate now. I have no idea if and when we'll be getting married now. Part of me wants to rush down to the courthaouse and git 'er done. But then part of me still dreams of the big white wedding I have fantasized about for years. And Shawn knows I have that dream and doesn't want to crush it. But yet, if we wait until after the baby, when "We can afford it," will we ever be able to afford it?

Bills are just now getting caught up. And now with us being pregnant, we have so many projects to do and they all cost money. And all need to be done soon o before the baby is born. Our toilet is broke. We can;t flush it without filling a bucket with water and dumping it in the bowl. The furnace needs to be repaired before the winter rolls about. The soon to be baby's room needs to be dry walled. Our kitchen and living room carpets both need to be ripped up, sealed and replaced. And then there's car seats, baby gear, a crib and all the stuff a baby will need when it arrives.

I am over joyed, and yet, overwhlemed at the same time. I think the only time my mind rests is when I sleep. Maybe that's why I nap so often?

Thanks to all of you who have left comments and are sharing in my joy. This baby has been 10 years of trying to no avail. We truly feel blessed.

And MommyBrain, please email me or something. I would love to get in touch with you. We seem to have quite a bit in common. I could always use a new friend.

I love you all! Thanks for tuning in! I'm off to watch Meet the Fockers! And get back to being lazy! Weee!

Simply,

Sara