But, just because I am still Sara- that much I cannot change, Thank Gawd... let us take one last look back on 2004 and all that it had offered me. because to date thus far, 2004 has been my most happiest year. The one that for all time, has offered me so much hapiness and dreams come true- that it would be a sin not to give it one last shot out, right?

We rang in the New Year with our good friend Bryan at our place. It was the first New Year's in ages that I didn't spend it lying half dead in a flu induced coma or ill in some way. So that was a blessing. (We spent this NY's with Bryan again actually. Just this time at his house. They played Madden '05 ont he PS2 while I cooked dinner.)

February brought the very first Valentine's day that Shawn took me out to celebrate the "dreaded Hallmark Holiday that was created by a dumb woman simply to have another day to recieve presents from the poor race otherwise known as Men..." He took me on a double date to the Outback with some friends. It was divine.

March brought my family a wonderful delivery... my newphew Tyler John, who is now our Godson. A sweet and gentle little boy who has my looks (poor kid) and my brother's temper and 'tude! Tyler is another light in my life who has been a true joy for his Aunt Sara!

April brought one hell of a change in my life. I decided once and for all to have the gastric bypass surgery my doctor had recommended years before. It was a decision I had struggled with and was too chicken to accept until then. I had finally reached my all time low when I hit 367 lbs., became clinically depressed and anxious. Developed a bad case of asthma and all kinds of other issues.

May and June brought lots fo stress as I tried to jump through all of the hrudles thrown my way to have the gastric bypass surgery. My stress levels reached all time highs in those couple of months. Not only did I turn 28 in June, but I was also going to be going through a life altering surgery that in fact, could kill me.

Then came July... I was diagnosed diabetic. Struggled with a stomach bacteria the doctor's fought valliantly to get rid of so that I could have my surgery. The diabetes really scared me and we briefly thought that I would not be able to have my surgery. I was at the po9int that had tehre been one mroe delay, I was taking it as a sign from God to nto go through with it.

But then, on July 21st, 2004- my life changed. I went into the hospital at 5 a.m. I was surrounded by Shawn and my sisters and scared out of my ever loving mind! And with good reason it turned out... I almost died. They couldn't bring me back. I can only imagien whatv Shawn and my sisters were going through in the hours that they aited and waited and waited some more for news that all would be okay. And then it came... I was alive.

August brought mixed emotions. I struggled to get through each day. My incision had infected something fierce and was quite ill. Merely walking to the bathroom was an almost unattemptable feat. But I finallyg ot well enough to travel. And then an angel was born to us...

Ethan Joseph, my nephew and Godson was born to my sister. And I got to be there for his delivery! He is a sweet, strong and chunky as all get out little boy who we all love something fierce!

September brought much happiness. My diabetes had disappeared, my asthma, sleep apnea and depression- all gone. My ulcers- gone. My incisions were healed. And I was finally ale to return to work. And man, though I thought I would never utter the words- It was so good to go back! I felt home again for the first time in a long time.

October and November are but blurs in my mind as I worked a ton of hours to make up for all the time I was off on sick leave. Financially, we needed the moneya nd hell, workign is a damn good exercise routine for me.

Then came December... the mother of all months for me now! One I will never, ever forget! For the first time in years, Shawn and I were able to go home formy families Christmas Eve festivities. And that was a joyous occasion in itself. We had the most wonderful Christmas I have ever had!

And also in December, (and you're all probably pretty sick of hearing it by now) Shawn, my bestest friend in the world who goes back with me to when I was 8 and he 7, the boy I shared my very first kiss with... who I played Kick-the-Can and Bloody Mary with long into the summer nights, and whom I eventually got to look at me as I did him- romantically... after 11 years of "going steady", of loving one another, living together and becoming one another's significant halves- got off his dead ass and over his fears and proposed to me.

Looking back, I had some ups and a lot of downs in 2004. But the good, by far, for once overpowers and over writes all of the bad.

So tonight, I tearfully bid 2004 adieu. But not with tears of sadness, because there was just too much joy to be sad over it. 2004 is now gone... but I've got 2005 to look forward to! And all the joys and blessings it will be bringing my way!

Happy New Year, Friends... may this New Year bring you joys, happinesses and miracles. I know it will. This is gonna be the year!

::cues the church organ and choir:: Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Halllllelujah!

Amen!

Simply,

Sara