Well, the last time I wrote, I was fuming about the blow up Tara had at work and my reaction. And I was still seething mad. I am still mad. I guess I can�t lie. She did apologize� in her own way. And asked me if I forgave her to which I nodded that I did. The anger and pain were still too raw for me to trust my tongue to over power my emotions. Everyday, with each moment, things get a little better I guess. I DO forgive her. Honest. Am I over it? Nope. Has the trust factor been changed? Yeah. Disintegrated. Will things ever be the same? I can�t answer that yet. Will I ever get over it? Yeah. I need time to heal though.

Well, Tonight is my birthday as of midnight. I am officially: 27 years old. Well, not technically until 4:43 p.m. LOL. What do I think about that? I�m giddy, I made it through another year. WAHOO! That in itself after what the last year had brought in, is a minor miracle!

But, I�m depressed also. I worked 7 days last weekend so that I could have this weekend off. Well, no one would cover me, birthday or not except Julez. But since Michelle quit, that�s not possible. And on top of that, Shawn and I figured he�d have the weekend off since he worked the last 2 weekends in a row. But Tara took vacation for every other weekend and started with this weekend� so he got boned and our plans were shot right in the ass. But we�re not going to worry about it. Shit happens. But, when it comes to days off and people not covering or what not, we both hold grudges. So if anyone in the QC dept. wants a day off or takes vacation. I�ll be the one laughing and turning down the OT.

So, if we�re lucky, we will both have Sunday off. If that�s the case� then THAT will be my birthday. That will be the day my cell and house phone ringers go off. That�ll be the day when I get to do what I want� with the one I want. And right now, all I want for my birthday is Shawn. A nice dinner out, maybe a casual Sunday drive�. And insane sex somewhere kinky. Imagine that. Me! Miss Innocent. Muah ha ha.

Today was a pretty great day actually. Shawn had to be to work by 11a.m. to cover for a day shifters vacation. (Ugh) So we went to bed early. I got up about 8:30 a.m. �9 ish, showered, got him up and we both went on our merry way. He headed for work. I stopped for gas and cigs and headed for my annual visit to the Secretary of State to donate my hard earned cash ($54.00) for an itty bitty sticker that says, �Yes, my birthday came, I spent, I�m legal�. That done, I grabbed some food for Shawn and delivered it.

After that was all said and done, I headed into the city and started on an errand run. Had to go turn my damn cell phone back on. And of course, it being my b-day soon and all those accessories staring me blatantly in the face- I HAD to splurge. I got a new iridescent purple-bluish face plat and a nifty head set so I can talk hands free where ever, when ever. I love �em. Then I dashed off to the insurance company to keep my auto insured and they had to make sure that my car wasn�t damaged.

After that, I headed to Hunan�s Chinese. Yummy! One of the gal�s who used to work with me owns it now. She has really done a lot for that place. The food is better yet and the atmosphere is more relaxed. Go, Char! GO!

After lunch, I went to Wal-Mart and got some necessities didn�t really splurge on anything there. Then I headed to work. I was in a great mood. Almost intoxicated after a day in the fresh air and a day of shopping. And it didn�t really change for most of the night. So that was cool.

Other than Shawn not getting a much needed weekend off, and me having to work my b-day weekend, which is par for the course where we work, I�m happy as a pig in � well, maybe NOT that happy. But happy enough.

Simply,

Sara