Going back to work this week after having been laid off for the whole week before was hard. Especially having the whole 4th of July week off. YAY! I had a festive week to say the least. I am an EverQuest gamer. For those of you who haven;t heard of it, run as fast as your legs will carry you and buy it right now! It's an on line RPG where you interact with people from all over the world. I hear that it's alot like on line dungeons and dragons, but having never played that, I can't be for certain.

Well, after almost 2 years of playing and getting very close with a lot of fellow gamers, we decided to hold a Michigan Fan Faire for our guildies. It turned out great. Our friend Robert from Montreal made it, Kevin, Megan, Greg and Mike all from Oh-hi-ya! (Ohio) made it, Ozzy and Devon from New York made it... plus the locals were all here. It was a week of bar-be-ques, bon fires, beaches, golfing, drinking, laughing and just plain having fun. It was really great to meet the many people that we have interacted with on all sorts of levels, every day for a couple of years... I can't ait to do it again.

But now, I'm back to work. The heat has let up some. It's not been so humid or scorching hot. But inside the factory I work in, the temp is always at the very least 10 degrees hotter. So I'm still miserable. Everything at work was chaotic. After a week off, the old beasts (machines) didn't want to fire up or run properly. Which being a Quality Control Tech, makes my life that much harder. But alas, the weekend has arrived. WOOT!

I don't know how I will spend this weekend. I am flat broke. More so than ever after the lay off. My cousin and her friends are in town and wanted me to go out to catch up and hang out. But being broke, what fun could I have? I could always meet them at the bar and nurse a soda... I just don't know. Shawn (my boyfriend of what will be 10 years in September) is expecting some family up, we think.

I won;t be sticking around the house though if I can help it. His mother has been living with us for months and I am at the point of a severe drinking binge (and I do NOT drink) or having a nervous, psychotic breakdown. I'm not hoping for either. So I will just get away. There's just something about family that take advantage of you. And both sides of our family have done their fair share. They move in, ignore your wishes and rules... milk you of all that you have to give and them some, and whine when there's nothing left to give. And I will always be the bad guy. I'm the son's girl friend. And that puts me in a no-win situation. I'm here to tell you, there ain;t enough calgon, Baby.

I'm planning on having a "Family Pow-Wow" shortly. I'm gonna reitterate all of my rules, make it known that there will be no exceptions. And to politely point out the one and only door in or out of my house should they not like what I have to say. I have literally been so upset, that for 2 days I have been literally sick to my stomach. I can't eat, when I do I get sick. I can't sleep. I've just been miserable!

I need to find a local church. I miss surrounding myself with people of faith, who all get together to end their worries, who cling to hope and have undeterred faith. I still pray a lot. The Big Guy is really probably getting sick of me whining. But there's just something about going to church. For me at least. Not those stuffy type churches where every hym is monotone, every sermon plotted in a flier. The type where ya go in and there's electric guitars, drums, lopud music and a choir that not only the heavens can hear, but the south pole too. One where ya go in, get your groove on, find the spirit and some peace. Then ya sit down, hear a sermon from the heart. After, ya talk to regular people in jeans and tees, bikers with mohawks, people who all showed up for one purpose. Now THAT, my dears, is a church. For me, anyhow. Ya gotta go with what ya feel. I haven;t found one up here like that. But I will, oh yes, I will!

Well... I'm off to get some rest and try to figure out where I can go this weekend for some peace of mind and sanity....

Simply,

Sara <3