Let's see... first things first. Shawn and I are fine. Okay, maybe not fine in every sense of the word. But we're getting there. We have talked, laughed, cried and opened our souls to one another. Neither one of us held anything back and we have been able to take this whole ugly ass situation and sort through all of the bull shit and try to make sense of it all. But at any rate, we've both agreed that we love one another. That we've come too far to turn our backs on us now. And we're doing everything we can to save us. Inclusding couples counselling believe it or not. When he offered I thought it was another empty promise. But it wasn't. He's going. That itself makes me one of the happiest women alive. I'm starting to think his empty promises might be disappearing and filling themselves with hope. And it's a wonderful thing to see happening... So we're getting ourselves put back together again.

My health has taken it's toll on me also. I've been pretty damn moody, bitchiness being the one my inner self seems to opt to be most often these days. I have a 5mm kidney stone embedded somewhere within my left kidney. If you have never had the misfortune of a kidney stone, thank your lucky fucking stars! It's the worst pain I have ever, ever known. It's debilitating and all too often even walking hurts. Each step I take jars my body just enough to reduce me to wanting to drop and curl up right where I am at the moment and move into the fetal position, suck my thumb and cry for my Momma. The pain pills work- sometimes. So I finally got in to see a speciallist who is sending me for more x-rays. Then I have to have a scope. NOT looking forward to that. And then some super sonic something or other to hopefully break up the stones to make them easier to pass.

And on top of that, my wisdom teeth are all rotting out of my head. Imagine that. One is broken off and the gum closed up over it. That ones okay, two others are normal. But the last one on the bottom right side of my jaw, started with a small hole, and now it's a HUGE gaping hole with exposed nerves. I have gone through 3 bottles of extra strength Anbesol (God bless that stuff) in the past week alone. I wake up hourly just to reapply as soon as the pain awakens me. But I finally get to go see the oral surgeon on Monday. So I took a vacation day and will have all 4 removed. That once upon a time scared the bejesus outta me. But after the tooth pain I have faced, it will be a relief I assure you!

And work has been a scary place to be these days. Now mind you, I just bought a brand new 2005 Kia Sorento. It's a spiffy little SUV that we purchased a couple of weeks ago. And I love it. Unfortunately, after the meeting work held the other day, I'm scared I might not had a job long enough to pay the damn notes on it. Ugh. I think I mentioned in a previous entry that our corporation filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy protection. Well, in the process of doing so, Honda (who is 60%) of our business, got screwed out of some $10 million and decided that the '06 Honda Civic Knuckle line they just awarded us had to be moved. We lost that job. And they say that unless we get sold, we're all done getting any business from them. Well, cheese and rice. How's that for job security? So we're all waiting on baited breath, a hope and a whole lot of prayers that Eagle-Picher finds some corporation that will buy us.

On top of all of that, I am scheduled 64 hours this week and next. So when Memorial weekend rolls around, I'll be ready for the long weekend. Hopefully, I won;t sleep it away. I kind of can;t though. The only day I will actually be able to rest is that Monday. Saturday, we're headed down to Saginaw for my Grandma's 85th birthday party. Then we have to head home that night to be home Sunday morning to make it to his brother Shane's graduation.

So I'm hanging in there, barely. But it's getting better day by day. I just take things and deal with everything one moment at a time. And I spoiled myself a little bit this week. I got my nose re-pirced (it had closed up 'cause it wasn't done right), I got my nails did, my hair cut and bought myself a cast iron pot set I've been drooling over for awhile.

Thanks for tuning in and I promise that so long as I am not in a pain killer enduced, over worked and sleep deproved state- I will try to update!

Simply,

Sara