Well, maybe you don't. But I do. And for me, today is and has been one of those days. I'm actually glad it's winding down, tho I still wonder how the hell time seems to escape and pass me by without me being any more the wiser. Some call it a "blonde thing," I prefer to call it a "Sara thing". Otherwise known as the "Brain Fart."

I swore to myself last night that I would NOT stay up late and would get to bed at what was a decent hour so as not to sleep through the alarm. Heh. THAT wasn't meant to be. I ended up shrugging into my jammies and waddling rather stiffly off to bed, onlt to flip thru some channels and land on a docu-drama HBO was currently running. It was about some small town back in yester-year when the whites and blacks were segregated. Well this crazy white bitch was cheatin' on her hubby with a white guy who she suspected of being unfaithful to her. (What goes around...) Well, when she 'fronted him about her, he beat her senseless. She must ahve known that would have been a dead give away, so she ran into the street and cried a "nigger" beat her. To make a really long story short, they lynched all but 2 black men and most the women and children to my horror. I could barely pull my eyes away. Come 7 a.m. I was angry, well past tired and wanting to go back in time and lynch me some white crackers my damn self.

So at some point when my dreams set in, that's exactly what I did. I went to that small town and started hanging people of my own color. One by one. Only I refused to pick off the women and children. Even I had a heart. But needless to say, I slept fitfully. And straight through my alarm. Once again Shawn had to wake me, to which he still is rubbing in my face and most likely will for years to come.

So once again I raced about and got ready as fast as I could. We made it into work with a few minutes to spare. But my body refused to wake up at my rushed speed. I was a tad grumpy, a bit irritated and wishing I was everywhere but where I was.

Oddly enough, Tara was in a fun loving mood and even commented on my sour one. I had to laugh. She finally started pulling out of her slump and I started digging into one of my own. Go figure.

Work went all right. I started feeling better after the Crew and I started tearing into our chili cheese and extra onion dogs. Man, did those ever hit the spot. And work for the most part, went well. The weather was really nice and we were able to sit out at the picnic tables for break which helped air out my head and clear my thoughts.

Tara and I got to talking about the weekend and she asked me if I was going to head north with her to her hometown for her Mom;s b-day this weekend. Originally, I said yes, then decided I needed a weekend off. But then realized next weekend is a 3 day weekend for us, so what the hell, why not go? I can spend the holiday weekend home. So I got it set in my head I was going and told her so. Cleared it with Shawn and started gearing up for a fun weekend. Only hitch is that my line is running Saturday. I asked the normal hour gobbler on 3rd if she wanted my time, but for once, she said no.... so- unless I get coverage, I'm damned to spending Saturday slinging iron and gauging parts. Go figure. But I haven't given up totally yet.

After work, Shawn and I headed to the local we-have-it-all and more store where we grabbed some needed groceries, he bought a computer game and for once, I refrained from any desired purchases that weren't necessary as I will need money to go north if I am able to.

After that, we headed home and uinloaded. I took Chewbacca Lynn for her nightly walk to chase after the wind and relieve herself in various regular points all over our yard. Points which I know exist, but forget are there until I walk in them and end up slinging a string of cuss words together that would have made my own grandfather blush. (And he's a sailor!)

I also started dishes, laundry, vacuumed, fixed BBQ'd beef for dinner and fussed about a bit longer before coming here to update. I wasn't sure I was going to since I swore that tonight, I would damn sure be asleep before or at 5 a.m. But here I am. The 3 fingered chicken pecker on speed. I just polished off my dinner, and am having my after dinner smoke. (Cigarettes, thank you)

I got a voicve mail from my sister Lisa tonight, a return one since I had called her cell to leave my niece a voive mail. Cells are wonderful. They allow me to voice mail my niece to tell her I'm thinking of her and she can do the same since our hours are so different.

My sister is getting sick, her voice sounded funny. It was kind of cute. But just hearing that nearly sent me to crying. I never really realize how much I miss them until i either see them again or I hear them over the phone. I only moved just over 2 hours from home, which I had thought was really "no big deal." But my Dad, Mom and siblings are and always have been my life support. I loved being a part of their lives, and knowing they were only a short few miles away.

Now it's a long distance call, an obnoxious and grueling drive. If I am having a rotten day I can't just hop int he car and stop over for a chat or a hug. I miss out on my niece's school functions, dance recitals, sports outings. It kills me knowing that I am missing out on so much.

I just have to keep telling myself that love knows no distance. And sometimes that soothes me. Other times, it doesn't. I think I scare my Dad a lot when I start getting home sick and call him at his work just bawling. He doesn;t know what to think and is sure something went terribly wrong and someone's been hurt, maimed or killed and then I spent the next hour assuring him that all is well, I just needed a "Daddy fix." Funny, even at 27, I still need those. I'm sure I will for the rest of my life.

I come from a very distant family where my parents and my siblings were pretty much all I had. Which is really sad if ya ask me, but in all honesty, they are enough. But enough about that as the tears are a cmin', and once they start, it's like Niagara Falls... and Lord knows those can't just be shut off.

So on a crazier note, do y'all know how HARD it is to pick a pierced nose?! Egads, I'm going nuts. Working in the factory I work at, "Smog Central", it's an every day occurance to get goobered up that ordinary blowing of the nose just doesn;t cut it and ya just have to pick. Man, I 'bout sent myself thru the roof when I did try to blow! I keep forgetting the post is in there and push down... look out Holy Mother, that's a pain you don't wanna go thru. And for those times, like now, where blwing isn't cutting it and ya just HAVE to pick... it ain't easy lemme tell ya. And I won't even get into when yer goobers tangle around the post and ya can;t remove the jewlery, pick your nose OR blow. But I can tell ya, I'm getting skilled at nose picking. Yup, Yup! Like y'all wanted to know that right!?

New thing in the local news is tongue forking. I guess some guy went to a surgeon who refused to do it, but a tattoo artist did. Holy Mary Mother of God! WHY????!!!! Why in hell would ya want to fork your tongue? What purpose would that serve? I'm all for tattoos and piercings (for my taste, in moderation)... but self mutilation and morphation? No thanks and pass the grey poupon please.

Holy Jesus! That's just NUTS!

Well, I s'pose I should startg winding down now. I still ahve to hit the shower, get my gear ready for a new day, and I still have some goobers that I have to tend to in case ya wanted to know!

I WILL have a good day tomorrow damn it... I promise.

And with any luck, I'll find an over time whore on day shift who wants my saturday shift so Tara and I can go paint a small hick town in Northern Michigan, red!

I have my hopes high. I will prevail. Muah-ha-ha!

And to Lisa, if you read this... I miss you and love you... and good golly, I need a sissy fix, woman! And kiss our babies for me!

The comically insane, but quite simply...

Sara Jane