Like I said, I have been all doom and gloom. With Christmas coming and not enough money to pay the bills, let alone come up with presents for our families, I ahve been Bah-humbugging it and hoping this year, Christmas would just pass me by. Don;t get me wrong, I'm still not full of Christmas cheer, and there's stilla little piss in my vinegar... but right now, It's on the back burner. And for once I am all smiles.

Tonight was the night for our work Christmas party. It's been all the hype with Tara, Renee and I all week. Then I thought since I hadn't a new outfit, maybe I shouldn't go. But I felt a strong desire to get out of the house and just cut loose for awhile. So we went. His cousin Tim and his wife Laura were our guests. We haven't had the chance to hang with them in awhile and it was good to see them.

The food was fine. Better than most years actually that I recall. The same people do it every year. But for some reason, the fopod tasted heavenly to me. There was chicken, venison and pork. The one super slaughtered the hog himself, and of course the venison was fresh having been deer season and all. I'm not a huge venison fan. But tonight, it wasn't too gamey. Hooray for that.

After dinner they did the raffle. We purchased $20 worth of tickets which ended up being 24 total. Our usual. Plus each employee got a special ticket for the employee raffle. Not long into it, I won a $50 gift certificate for a local grocer. Not to shabby. I would have preferred a few other things but hey, with that much money for groceries, I can save some grocery cash right? And the raffle went on and then I hit again. This time in the employee drawing for a $50 gift certificate to the Mall. WOOT! I was geeked. Another ticket called, Renne won a coat. Next tickey, YES!! Shawn won on an employee only ticket. A coat with our union logo. A christmas gift for someone since we orded one for each of us. Then a few bits later, I hit again for $50 cash! HALLELUJAH! Man, I was on a roll! So in all, I spent $20, got a coat that was worth $80 and $150 in cash and gift cards. That made me all shits and giggle like.

After the raffle, the dance floor opened and the music started. An old song by White Lion I think it was played and I asked Shawn to dance. Now mind you, we have in 9 years danced exactly one time, and that was a bitter sweet occasion. It was ruined to say the least but I wont go there. Tonight, he agreed, and we danced. We were probably the sorriest couple of the bunch... but I was dancing on air. Shawn made a comment about my huge smile and how it never stopped. My friends stared in awe. I almost cried. He kissed me, he told me he loved me, and we danced....

We've been home for hours. The coach has long since turned into a pumpkin. The ball clothes or our versions there of, lying in heaps to be washed and rehung. And me, still smiling... and though my aching, screaming feet have long since stopped dancing... my heart dances on....